I invite you to imagine yourself being devoted to a romance with Christ. You have determined to share everything with Him: your heart, your soul, your mind, and your body. You make a vow to Him that you will become a safe lover. Every day, you wake up with a heart that anticipates Him…what surprise does He want to bring you today? What surprise do you want to give to Him by showing up for someone else? As you move through your day, you move at a pace that watches for His love to break into your life. You can’t wait to express to Him how much you adore Him for bringing you the safety of daily love. You also watch for opportunities to adore Him through nature, the animal kingdom, or people. There is nothing more that you want than to bring pleasure to your Heavenly lover by learning to cherish yourself.
When you fail at something, you are quick to run to your heavenly lover and show deference to Him as a Masterful Artist. You sink into His kindness and rest secure in His ability to make something even more beautiful in your life. You take in the sweetness of being allowed to be in a process. You can practice again tomorrow or when you are ready. You receive His peaceful stillness…a sign that He has already accomplished the work on your behalf so that you can grow without fearing intimidation and withdrawal when you fail. He will not be disgusted with you when you make a mistake. He will not be mocking your performance behind your back. He wants you to succeed and so you allow yourself to be enjoyed no matter what you do.
When you take risks relationally or vocationally, you surrender the outcome. Maybe it will lead towards something that others join. Maybe you will stand alone in your enjoyment of what you offered. Either way, you are being true to express who you are in the present. The surrender opens pathways to mutual pleasure with those who are attracted to what you offer. It also opens pathways to deeper pleasure if no one joins. You can’t lose by risking. You are communing with the Storyteller...the Writer of Divine Community. The story is about Him and where He wants to write you into the bigger story. You trust He will write you into His story when it is time. Until then, He is setting the stage for your character.
When you move in the river of your desires, you may meet people who don’t want the same thing as you. And it may even be people who you really want to travel with (like spouses, children, extended family, and friends). Though it sometimes is rejection or disapproval to have mismatched desire, it doesn’t have to end there. Once your humanity is felt, you can move towards discovery. Who are your adventuring partners? How will God write them into the chapter about you in His story?
There is mystery in hearts that hold similar desires. It is one of the sweetest pleasures on earth…to walk with those who want the same thing and to release those who do not. Rest assured…desire is trailhead. As you walk, you will find out who is going with you. Even Jesus had the disciples sent to him as he was walking.
Cherish your romance with Divine Love. Cherish your process. Cherish your risks. Cherish your desires. This is part of what it means to cherish yourself. When you do, you become part of the river of life that flows into cherishing others.
I know this is vision...impossible to do apart from wrestling and asking Jesus to work in you where you can't understand it or don't align with it. Neither could I for many, many years and I am fifty-eight. What I have received over a lifetime of formation, I pass along to you.
